If you live in Brussels and work in policy and communication, you know that one of the coolest jobs you can aspire to is to become the Spokesperson to an EU Commissioner. Of course they work a lot, and they probably have their share of bureaucratic woes, but let’s admit it: in the Brussels communications arena this is THE JOB to have. When you think of a typical Spokesperson you probably think Marlene Holzner ( spokesperson to Energy Commissioner) about whom I could write a post for an entirely different reason.

But, as Dylan would say  " The times they are a-changing" and you would be surprised nowadays to meet a Commission Spokesperson who actually looks like the guy in the picture on the left. Meet Joseph Hennon, Spokesman to Environment Commissioner Janez Potocnik. How often have you seen anyone dressed like that for such a serious sounding job? Here we have a real life example of the following principle: you can have a career in government /EU institution and still continue being yourself.

Here is a guy who loves his music (he plays and tours with a band in his free time) and wants to continue doing it no matter what. But here is also a guy who needs to pay his mortgage and wants to have a family life. So instead of choosing one path over another, he strives to combine both…and it works!  How does he do it? I would say it is because he has the skill to communicate his professionalism and gain the trust of others independently of a suit or a smooth way of talking. This is a great skill to have if you strive to be a good communicator.

Another thing I like about this guy is that although he never studied communications (which is not so uncommon among Comms people in the EU actually), he is brave enough to apply his experience of communicating for his band/music to communicating about his Commissioner and his work. So, he tries to create a media buzz and even gets his Commissioner touring the EU. He uses Twitter to keep fans updated about what is going on in DG Environment and carefully chooses which hot topics to promote. He doesn’t worry too much over who his target audience should be, or how to make the EU more popular. He doesn’t try to act smart by proclaiming the End of the Press Release and he doesn’t worry about getting his tweets pre-approved: his boss trusts him well enough to know that you can’t have quality communication without trust.

EU institutional communication is changing for the better and getting closer to "ordinary citizens" thanks to people like Joe. Keep it up!

The first time I took a cooking class was about three years ago and it was part of a team-building event in my previous job. When we- a bunch of hungry employees- realised what we were getting into, we felt a bit disappointed. There we were at Christmas, getting treated to dinner by our generous employers, and we actually had to do all the work! We were divided into groups and each group made a different dish. I remember that the food was good (but there was hardly enough for all of us), we all got tipsy mid-way through and had to be really careful with those knives. However, I could not tell you now, no matter how hard I tried, what dishes we prepared. I don't remember any single recipe from that day. 

When it comes to cooking class, the value of these is rarely in learning a new skill. The cooking skill takes a long time to perfect and no matter how many classes you take- if you don’t regularly cook at home you can forget it. A cooking class is also not about learning a new recipe because you can get tons of these on the Net and you can even watch a video that will show you the exact steps. Cooking classes are actually about relationship building and bonding. They are a perfect team or better yet friend-building exercise. If you do it with friends you end up talking about the most intimate and funny things. If you do it alone, you get to network and meet new people.

In today’s cooking class, I not only had a great time with my friends but I also met a nice couple who live in my neighbourhood (the woman, Virginie works in communication- so we have yet to catch up) and a journalist from RTL.be (radio) whom I immediately sent over to the Batibouw fair (taking place right now in Brussels) to interview my husband on renewable energy. Who would have said that a Saturday cooking class would ever be so productive? So even if I do not remember what where the exact ingredients of the Dhal we prepared, and even if the sauce with condensed milk was way to sweet for me in the dessert, the whole experience was one of bonding and community building like no other.

If you want to learn how to cook, just get hold of some good cookbooks ( I love any book from Marabout editions as they are so easy to follow) ,watch videos on YouTube and just cook as often as you can- for family, friends and for yourself (no excuses single people!).On the other hand, if you are feeling sociable, want to catch up with friends or improve relations with colleagues, I encourage you to try cooking classes. The places I tried in Brussels that I can recommend: Slurps and Mmmmh!. Do you know any other fun cooking workshops that offer a friendly atmosphere?

There are some people who claim that everything can be taught. Others believe that this not to be true, because a lot of learning is a consequence of our experiences in life and our own personalities. All those who know me well would easily guess that I belong in the first category: I am a firm believer that if you put your mind to it, you can learn (almost) anything out of a book, from internet research, videos, at a workshop or just by thinking about things long enough.

So, for example, when my eldest brother was being ridiculed for his attempt to improve his swimming technique out of a book, I was quick to stand to his defense. Why not? And when I suddenly became single 5 years ago, after being in a relationship for all my young adult life, it  quickly hit me that a) I knew nothing about dating and b) I wanted to learn what it was all about, even if it meant devouring dating books as the “learning nerd” that I am.

So where to start? With the knowledge that I collected and the conviction that everything can be learned, I could organise a workshop on dating. I would probably be better off at doing it in the States though where people believe in the concept and practise it almost to boredom. I know that their idea of dating has a lot of critics here in Europe. To us the US dating style seems artificial, fake, interested and too-business like. But, since there seems to be no clear EU alternative (except going to a bar each weekend and hoping for the best) I would first convince the workshop attendees that dating is a perfectly normal way to find love and there is nothing to be ashamed of. And what would I tell them next? The workshop would probably be structured along these lines:

Intro: Why Dating is cool and fun (and let no-one tell you otherwise)
First chapter: Where to find potential dates and how to recognise that someone might be interested
Second: Why you shouldn’t stop dating as soon as you think you found “the one”
Third: Some ideas on where to go and what to do on dates (so that you don’t end up being broke…and bored)
Fourth: Dating etiquette (or how to politely stop dating someone without being too mean)
Fifth: Dealing with nerves, doubts and rejections
Sixth: How to communicate who you really are and what you really want in life
Seventh: Crossing the (thin) line that separates a date and a relationship
Eight: Relaxing, having fun and letting go

So there it is! A perfect course on dating, with exercises, tips and reading list included. And what I forgot to mention that it would be a mixed workshop. I don’t allow any separation of men and women on this topic. They both need to know how it works and give each other useful feedback.

I don’t think I will actually organise one of these anytime soon but if you have any ideas on what else could be included, let me know!

When I was growing up in Croatia, the concept of entrepreneurship was completely alien. The country was immersed in communist ideas (Croatia was within Yugoslavia at the time) and it had been stuck in that ideology for a very long time. New ideas, creativity and the like were clearly not on the agenda. My summers on the asphalt were long and boring. Winters were cold and snowy. School followed the ideas of the government: no creativity, no innovation, no standing out.  But as kids we had the freedom to go out and play, and stay playing on the street as long as we wished.

The human spirit has a life of its own, and the less opportunities you give it, the more opportunities it creates. As a child I remember being very creative and entrepreneurial- probably much more than now! Without any interference of adults we organised singing contests and opened little temporary shops, we went on short excursions, wrote poetry, opened a detective club, and initiated a school newspaper. There was no cost for being creative (i.e. you didn’t have to take a class or join a club), no punishment and no reward either. It was just what you did when you had nothing else to do. With only three TV channels, no Internet, no game consoles, no trips, no McDonalds and a school day until 2pm, we were happy kids with a lot of time to play!

Fast forward many years later, and here I am sitting in the middle of Europe, in peace, in democracy and entrepreneurship is the new panacea. There are hundreds of organisations in Belgium alone fostering entrepreneurship. Universities are offering many courses in business skills and business gurus tell you how to become your own boss in easy-to-read books. Entrepreneurs are popular people in our imagination because they seem to have what it takes- they are creative, brave and non-conformist. They make it to the top by being innovative and persistent. We think of Silicon Valley geeks who started as smart kids in a garage and are now leading the worlds most powerful companies. We think of the self-made person who cannot stand hierarchy and rules, who quits his job bravely and then sets out to create their own company. But all of this is obviously a dream. Not quite the American dream (although it borrows lots of its elements) but the collective dream of the Internet age generation.

We romanticize the Entrepreneur without stopping to think of the sacrifices- in terms of the little time these people can actually spend with their family, the inexistent social life they have, the enormous time they need to devote to thinking about money in order to make it big and the terrible consequences it often has on their health.  We often believe that the only thing that would make us happy is to have our own company, be our own boss and voila, be free. But in reality, being entrepreneurial can be just as a trap as anything else. You don’t get any special acknowledgment unless you have “made it”, unless your little project has somehow grown into this great respected company.  You don’t get your picture in the Saturday paper unless you have converted this entrepreneurial and creative spirit into something that can be monetised. And this kind of acknowledgment culture and dream mentality is damaging both to existing Entrepreneurs and to the young minds who dream of becoming one.

I believe that being an entrepreneur, having that creative spirit and inquisitive state of mind should already be a reward in itself. If you are lucky to have it, and you are motivated by creating new things, ideas, meeting new people, doing new projects- well good for you! You don’t need anyone’s approval because already you are great. You don’t need to quit your job- you can try to innovate within it (if your hierarchy is appreciative AND if you have the people skills to convince them to listen).  You don’t need to make a lot of money from a new venture; you can simply try to earn yourself a living.  And you don’t need to be an Internet geek to create new services and products. Entrepreneurship is not only related to what you can do with technology- it spreads to any area of life- what you can do with education, the health system, the unemployed, the needy. Entrepreneurship is also what you do at your job and what you do at home- in your free time- with your natural talents. The entrepreneurial spirit can help you find a job, or get you a promotion, or push you to start your own company. Entrepreneurship is essentially about your personal and professional development, your talents and your dreams and not about what wonderful prize might wait for you at the end.

About a month ago, at a conference in Brussels I made a new friend. She was helping out as a photographer at the conference and I was there as a volunteer so we started chatting. I immediately took a liking to her, we exchanged details and a week later I was sitting in her flat having a great conversation over tea and croissants.

We talked about how we felt about living in Brussels. She is a relative newcomer and neither her nor her boyfriend had any previous ties with Belgium. I have been here for 4 years and I am married to a Belgian so my take on things was slightly different. It is funny how we each see similar experiences through different lenses! Eva liked Brussels a lot but found it hard to settle at first because she was not sure where and how she and her boyfriend were supposed to fit in. Not many of her countrymen live here and looking for friends based on nationality was out of the question.  Belgians were even harder to spot and whenever she tried to meet them through work or volunteering, other expats or “half-Belgians” would show up. So she finally got used to the idea that it was the expat community that she would settle into. But who was this “international community” in Brussels? Could it be well defined? Did its members know they formed a community? These questions we discussed and could not find clear answers.

On my part, I was content to claim that I felt part of the international community in Brussels and therefore, I assumed, it existed. My closest friends- Austrians, Canadians, Germans, Spaniards and many others could all identify with the community, I claimed. We had many things to differentiate us as a group from other communities: we speak various languages-including French (but not Dutch) and our common language is always English. On weekends we go to Café Belga, the Flagey market, a salsa or yoga class and the occasional Sunday brunch. On Christmas holidays we always go back to visit our families. So, “there you go”, I said to Eva- “we ‘internationals’ are clearly a community”! Eva was not that easily convinced. She rightly pointed out that what I was defining was my group of friends and not the whole international community in Brussels. This last group is much more elusive and attempts to define it clearly are next to impossible. It is composed of very different individuals coming to Brussels with a wide variety of attitudes and expectations. Some really enjoy hanging out with their countrymen and are a bit nostalgic for their countries, others are happy to forget their nationality- at least temporarily. Some are single; others already have their own families. Some worked for the European Commission, others for big corporations; some are freelance workers always on the go; others are stay-at-home mums.

And that brings me to the actual concept of community. It is obvious that we all need a sense of community and belonging. Living in Brussels will not bring an exception of that universal need. Human connections and social capital are very good for our well-being and very useful for finding work or getting through tough times. But it is not necessarily the belonging to a loosely defined international community that will help us feel more connected to a place. What really makes us connect with each other and with the place itself is the fact that we continue to organise, participate and collaborate in activities through which people- of any background- can connect in a specific place and time. It can be through volunteering, a marathon, a charity, a workshop or any activity we can invent. And now we have a new opportunity. The Open Kitchen idea is great because it allows anyone (will YOU do it?) the initiative to open their home and invite new people, who will share a meal, a conversation and let themselves be entertained by a local artist. It allows us to really SEE each other and CONNECT on new levels, independently from the confines of clearly defined communities.  We can just relax and be “people who need people”. Fostering new human connections and valuable exchanges with others, while living in Brussels, is the way to go. And who knows, maybe one day, we can say without a doubt that what we have here is truly a community.

(Post originally written for open-kitchen.eu)

Let’s admit it: tourism is mainly about our own enjoyment and sense of adventure. We even feel we have the right to it: we deserve a break from our hectic life, and (in Northern Europe) our bodies yearn for the sun. When holidays come around, we daydream about sunny beaches, delicious new food and exciting cultural sights. But there is another aspect of tourism, which we increasingly strive for: meeting and interacting with the locals. Many of us are eager to talk to people who live elsewhere, to understand their lifestyle and compare it to ours. Those moments of insight prove our common humanity and often make us more open to other cultures than any other activity.

In some developing countries the tourism industry still thrives on an exclusive model: you are flown in to a paradise resort and there you are happily confined, enjoying the occasional excursion. So your chances to meet and get to know the locals are slim. Luckily, more Europeans are now exchanging that old tried model for a new one: travelling with local agencies, moving around the country on their own and making last moment decisions on where to eat or sleep. This way we get to interact more with the locals and we can spend our money where it is needed the most.

Sometimes, to our delight, the locals are communicative and helpful. Other times the situation is different and they seem distant and serious. So what can we do to break the ice? How can we improve our communication and get to know the “other”? One way is to stop using our camera so often. We tourists often make the mistake of pointing a camera at other people’s faces the first time we see them. This can create feelings of unease and even animosity among the “subjects” of the photos. So if you want to take a photo of someone with your camera please smile at the person, wave your hand to say hello, come closer and say something, in any language you know. You can even shake hands and introduce yourself. With these actions you show that you are a friend and not a foe. Only then should your camera intervene.

Another thing we tourists often do, and which prevents us from getting closer to the locals, is to appear uninterested in their lives. In the western world it is not common to ask strangers many questions because it might seem rude and inquisitive. But in most developing countries, especially the warm ones, life revolves around chatting. So asking the locals a few concrete questions will not throw them of track. Travelling is a great opportunity to understand how people feel about their country, their government, their schools and their lives in general. Certain questions lead us to new horizons of understanding. The more you ask, the more they see you care and the more they open up. Works universally!

And then there is a great barrier, which consists in feelings of guilt. When you visit a country where many people live in poverty, you are clearly aware (although no one would dare show it) that this fact alone separates them from you. It is indeed a strange feeling and we do not understand why, but we do feel guilty. Are we more privileged because we work in offices rather than do manual labour? Are we luckier to have a monthly salary and get to travel and really enjoy the fruits of our work? Definitely, we are. But although this can cause some envy in the locals, it does not mean they hate us. In most cases they have other things to worry about. And they surely have reasons to feel luckier than we are in many other aspects. So we need to get rid of the guilt. It is not the tourists’ fault that a country is poor. Even if it is true that in the past our Europeans nations colonised many developing countries and have deprived them of valuable resources, times have changed. We are a new people and these countries have new exciting opportunities ahead. By visiting a country, by buying their products, and using their services we are contributing to their economy. We are also acknowledging that the country exists, that we consider it beautiful and worth the visit. And when we feel that some locals only see us as a walking dollar (or euro) we need to break the negative circle immediately. We should not feel obliged to pay people for their kindness or to buy things from them we really don’t like. We need to be friendly and show through our interaction that we are much more than walking dollars.

And that brings me to customer service. Any country, no matter how poor it is, has the possibility to improve the life of its people by making sure they are offering a good quality and friendly service to its tourists. In the tourism industry this can be done by explaining to hotel and restaurant staff how tourists like to be treated and by asking for our feedback as much as possible. We tourists often hang around hotels and restaurant managed by westerners because we know what to expect in terms of service. If positive experiences abound in locally managed places we will definitely prefer to go there.

So, wherever you go next, be open to talking to local people. The kind of holiday where you meet the locals and truly get to know them will be the one you will never forget!

I have taken a very long break from my blog and luckily there is no need for justification. I have the best excuse ever: I got married. I haven’t talked about it in any social network so there is still a good chance that I will bump into someone who doesn’t know. This is great because when I tell them in person ( so much better then on-line for these announcements), people will congratulate me for weeks and months to come. That little thing keeps me going, feeling fresh and very “jeune marieé”.

The experience of getting married has shown me that if getting married is your thing and if you already have a person by your side whom you love and respect immensely (nothing less than that, mind you), and life is smiling at you (i.e. at least one of you has a job), getting married is the way to go.

There is no better opportunity than your wedding day to remind you :

1.  Who you real friends are
2.  What your family is like ( the good and the bad stuff, but specially the good stuff)
3.  How lucky and happy you are (in general terms)

While it is true that life is full of  dreary grey days, the day you get married is so amazing and colourful that it feels like a gigantic firework exploding and shedding fountains of light into every corner of your, let us admit, routine existence. The London Olympics opening show is nothing in comparison to your wedding day.

From the communication standpoint, a great reason to get married is that your family and friends make speeches in which they tell you how much they really care about you. You learn how your loved ones see you and, often you hear these things for the first and ONLY time. At our wedding we had a group of friends of my husband who made their speech with the help of an Ipad. That was cool. But most of our family just stuck to a written speech or an improvised speech. Oh boy, the things you learn from these speeches! Apparently, the day I was born my two older brothers took me home from the hospital in a tram ( with my dad ). Yes that is right- a tram, these funny squeeky transport monsters that are still the main form of public transport in some cities like Zagreb ( my home town) and Brussels ( where I live).  I need to contrast that info with my parents because it sounds completely crazy ( didn’t we have a tiny car back then?) but knowing my dad it doesn’t completely surprise me. If it is true, I will never look at trams the same way- I might actually start stamping my tram ticket a bit more diligently!

In summary, these wedding speeches are invaluable – they are living history. They provide you with details of who you were before and who you are now; and who are the people that actually know and appreciate what you have become.

And you only get that “I am a star” feeling at your wedding. We all need it sometimes, don’t you agree?