Connecting with the audience

Public speaking is about “providing every person in the audience a home in your eyes”. Lee Glickstein

Things are (almost) always going on in your head. When you speak and when you listen, you are often thinking often about “stuff”.  Don’t worry, you can go on thinking. But the key to good public speaking is the ability to think about stuff while meeting the eyes of (all) the people in the audience.

How many speakers complain that audiences today are not what they used to be? Well, no wonder, I say. I have also been guilty of writing emails and even tidying my bag, while listening to someone presenting. But that’s not because I am a bad audience. It was because I sensed the speaker was not there. Not with me.

The best thing a speaker can do is look at people in the eyes while speaking. This is not easy because we are often afraid of eyes. The judging eyes of those people who, for some reason, didn’t like us. The blank eyes of those who seemed bored. The stare of the person who observes our every move. We see so many things in that sea of faces and eyes. But we need to stop worrying. These eyes are harmless. They just want to listen and learn and connect. They want to “find a home” in our eyes.

Connecting with the audience is not an effort. It is about understanding that we are all already connected – just like this image of the trees that are actually connected , through their roots, even if they stand apart.

We need to learn how to be comfortable when we speak and our listener is not responsive. When the listener is just looking back at you with a neutral face. This doesn’t happen often in one-to-one. But it happens almost always in group situations. Let’s stop putting expectations on the audience; let’s stop projecting on them our fears.

The next trick is to learn how to meet the eyes of as many audience members as you can. And this is not because you need to “connect” with them or convince them of anything, It is simply because this is the best way to show them you are there. For them. Not for yourself. Or your presentation or your company. Remember: you are there for them.